I haven't slept much in the last day and a half. About 5 hours total, if you count the 26 minute nap I took during my EEG. Not sleeping does funky things to me. As of a year and a half ago, five hours is more sleep than I got on a nightly basis and now I'm curious how I did that. It is not that I get much more than that now, but it's rather striking the difference that an average of two or three hours more than I got eighteen months ago has affected me in just one night. I would think I should be able to handle at least one night on four or five hours sleep. I used to do it all the time. Thinking back to college and staying up till 3:30am and going to an 8:00am class with coffee in hand....ah social studies! Is this how one realizes that one is getting old? I didn't think this was suppose to happen at 25....I want my money back!
I'm no where near the point of hallucinations. But I'm so far past slap happy that if there was someone here to laugh with, there wouldn't be a dry eye for miles. And I am having a hard time concentrating. (Though that has been an issue even well rested lately so it's hard to say if the lack of sleep is fully to blame.) I'm also at the point where actually getting into bed is becoming a challenge. You know what I mean, I think. You've been there too. At least once. (And if you claim you haven't I know you never went to college...) You've been awake so long it seems almost wrong to sleep now. You do know what I mean, right? I haven't completely lost it, have I?? Is there someone at the door? Maybe it's the Sandman. I should let him in but instead I demand to resist and be productive. I can't. What is productive? Does my brain conprehend such a concept at this point? It wants to...grasp and make sense of...and do something....but...concentrating is getting harder by the second and sentences aren't even forming in the correct fashion. Now I'm just getting mad. I think I walk around in circles for another hour and pretend I don't hear the knocking. If I would just lay down I would be asleep before my feet hit the mattress.
Back in college, in 2004 when blogging was hardly even a thing yet, I was here. Blogging before blogging meant anything to anyone. You can look in the archives for my past writings, but it was much more like a journal in the past. When we started fundraising, I messed around with the idea of launching something new for this new phase of our journey but actually hated that idea. I am a sum of all of my life and so much of it is here already. So I'm keeping it here. At least for now.
My main focus these days is blogging about our newest journey into the bizarre and wonderful world of gestational surrogacy. Posts dated 2013 and forward will trend heavily toward that journey. I don't promise everything I write will be about though. There might be other things that sneak in occasionally.
Please come along our journey with us. As the saying goes, "The more, the merrier!"
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