Pin Cushion

**********WARNING **********

Reader Discretion Advised

Especially if Intimidated by Needles

A week an a half ago I had a diagnostic procedure done to hopefully shed some light on the cause of the pain in my leg that began back so many months ago. This has been such a pain in my butt (sometimes literally) that I didn't really mind that it was an invasive procedure and that it involved things being poked and injected into parts of my body that are relatively sensitive. Namely my spine. After all, I've had about eight spinal taps so I figured I could handle this thing called a myelogram just fine.

Because this procedure is "invasive" (which I guess also means "expensive") I waited to have it done privately; after the Workman's Comp insurance company deemed my claim incompensatible. I agree. It was an invasive procedure. For crying in the mud, it was a freaking spinal tap, plus dies, x-rays, and CT's. That's a lot. But here's how I see it: I probably should have just had the myelogram in the first place because I've had a few x-rays and a CT along the way. I feel like some of that could have been avoided if we just skipped to this step in the beginning. I haven't seen bills yet, but my guess is "invasive" does indeed equate "expensive." So while poking at my body they also deflated my wallet. Great! I will say this: the experience I had with the docs I chose was much better than those of the insurance companies choosing and this: I've concluded that Workman's Comp is not an experience I'd wish on anyone. We'll call it a "learning experience" - but that's being nice...too nice.

The myelogram was the 16th. Everything went well initially. But a couple days later I got a very intense headache. And people, trust me, I'm an expert when it comes to headaches, right? Well, I don't exactly know what it takes to be a headache expert but I should apply for that credential I think, don't you? This headache which started last Wednesday is what they call a spinal headache and very different from what I experience daily. Let me reiterate. Very different. Okay so that's clear.

So if you clicked that link you learned that spinal headaches are caused when the CSF fluid...basically the stuff that's inside your spine (shorter explanation for what it really is)...leaks out of your spine. What I can tell you is that it hurt a hell-of-a-lot. And it made me dizzy, disoriented, sick to my stomach, and as time went on throughout the week I also got very shaky and weak. All of these things began on Wednesday the 18th at work. Some people think I went back too quickly after the myelogram. But I maintain, I really was feeling fine.

So Thursday the headache got worse and I could barely manage to drive myself home from work. But of course, I drove myself there just fine. See, I'd left stuff unfinished the day before. So then it just got more unfinished (I wonder... will I ever learn??) because I had to leave early again. By 10:00am the headache had gotten too unbearable - I think I got in at 9:00 or something. I called my doctor but there was no answer. I called the hospital where they did the procedure. Talked to a nurse who said to call my doctor. But I'd just tried that. So I called again. I left another message and then pushed through an hour I shouldn't have and was home by noon. Never heard back that day but I coincidentally had an appointment with the doctor the next day. So my housemate drove me to the appointment.

It was horrible waiting. And then when I did see him I hardly remember what he said except that I had a spinal headache (Really? Genius? I'm sure I'll get a nice bill for that since it was extra than what I was there for him to tell me!!) He also said that I was to remain flat on my back in bed and drink caffeine until Monday and call him if it didn't improve. On the way home my housemate took me to Starbucks to get a head-start on the caffeine. I'll always remember it, not just because of the pain, but I ordered a caramel frappuccino the barista asked me, "Are you sure you don't want a hot drink? You look cold." Telling him I wasn't and it was a long story I took my frappuccino and tried hard to look normal.

All that happened over the weekend was that I got worse. Only it was okay as long as I wasn't moving. So I didn't move much. Oh, but when I did! The shaking a nausea increased steadily and I worried my sister (who is a nurse) to the point that she made me call a doctor on call on Sunday (I think) and ask for drugs so I could at least eat something. Still I wanted to eat little and shook a lot. Monday I called my doctor who was conveniently in surgery all day. He had the doc who did the procedure call me and her advice was to switch from laying on my back to laying on my stomach for the next 24 hours to see if that improved the situation. I didn't give it quite 24 hours to find out but it didn't. Not even a little.

By 8am on Tuesday morning I was on my way to the ER at RUSH. My sister, who also worked that afternoon, graciously agreed to give up her morning and accompany my mother and I to the ER. There after triage and telling them my doctor had phoned ahead to alert "them" that I was on my way I was "whisked" (actually I walked) into a room and waited for a long time. It was pretty much just a normal ER visit. Until my doctors started pissing off my other doctors. That was kind of a mess albeit kind of funny to watch while medicated. (Doctors really do have egos. You'd really think they'd want to work together; they are in the business of helping people feel better, right? I wonder why this is. Maybe all people have this problem with egos and when you are feeling ill it is simply more apparent in the people who are caring for you?? I'm not sure. But that is the closest I've been able to come.) Doctors - and there were very many of them - became a confusing web of different faces. The pain, and then the meds they gave me for the pain were not helpful in keeping straight the 15 or so different doctors that I had contact with in my brief stint in the hospital. I guess that's what you get at a teaching hospital!

I would give more detail but the shorter of the long is that I had to be admitted for a procedure that could have normally been done on an outpatient basis. But since the doctors that did the procedure had no existing relationship with me and I needed it on an emergency basis, admission to the hospital was really the only way I was going to get it done quickly. Otherwise it meant waiting until Friday, or maybe even next week. So I was "whisked" (actually I waited for three hours) into a room and met my lovely nurse...Heather.

She really was great. Maybe the best part of being in the hospital. Anyway, I've never met a nurse so cheerful and helpful. I think maybe she just had a good few days. She was moving, I remember she said that. Maybe she was excited. I was too out-of-it to ask. Then when I did feel better she was too busy getting me ready to go home. Oh well, she was great.

So the procedure I had done yesterday (the 25...I think) was called a "blood patch" and I'll just let you get that info from that link cuz really I don't want to talk about how they drew my own blood to create a clot in my back (by of course sticking yet another needle in it) to seal up the tiny little hole in my "dura" that was causing all these problems in my life for a week.

The doctors told me the results from the blood patch would be instantaneous. I of course was skeptical. And they weren't. But about an hour later I felt wonderfully better. And I was moving without shaking, I wasn't dizzy, and I wasn't even feeling ill anymore. So even though they had to poke about 13 holes in my hands and arm to draw my blood...which for some odd reason absolutely refused to come out of my body when they wanted it even though I had an IV they were drawing it from. (And one last dark medical note: it's really weird to watch blood literally stop coming out of your IV while medicated...subject for another blog....) I'd have to say this procedure and even the stay in the hospital were well worth it.

I might look and feel a bit more like a pin cushion than I did before this whole ordeal but the good news is that I feel much more like myself again. The other good news: I think we might be closer to knowing what is going on with my leg. The "bad news?" Well, it's great actually...getting to the bottom of the problem and/or fixing is going to require more needles too!!