My father is the fifth of ten children born to his mother and father. My father had two brothers. One has passed away. The other looks so much like my dad my little cousins (and even at times my Uncle's own children) get them confused. My father has seven sisters. A few of them bear resemblance to each other, but none of the seven really look strikingly like another member of the family.
My father's first brother, John Schaefer, an artist only just beginning to showcase his work, ended an eleven year battle with lung, brain, and bone cancer in February of 1997. His work hangs in the homes of his siblings. Never having made an impression in many other lives - his paintings will always color our worlds. I should add that he loved Diane. They never married but lived together for as long as I remember. We don't see her much anymore, but I'm sure she still loves him and he is someplace painting her with him.
Sue Schaefer is my father's eldest sister. For many years now I remember finding out when my aunt "came out of the closet." I suppose it was only known to a few at first, then passed to those of us who were younger down through the proper order on the family tree, that Sue has chosen to live in love with a woman. Her name is Susan. I don't remember Sue without her, but I do remember my early visit being introduced to her roommate. They live in Seattle. About two years ago Sue was diagnosed with breast cancer. She's fighting, and for now she's healthy. I imagine Susan to be loving and supportive through the fight, though I don't know her well.
Ellen Schaefer is next number three of ten. She married once, a policeman whom I believe she'd rather forget. But he gave her two daughters who have both grown up and married...one of whom has given her two grandsons. A long time ago, when her girls were young, she battled and won a fight with melanoma and has the scars to prove it. Now she's going to school again. My dad tutors her in statistics occasionally. She lives with and loves a man named John now. He loves her too. They are perfect for each other.
Ann Marie Schaefer is the sister that comes right before my dad. She is quite a character. My mom describes her as a "hippie" - I'll just say she likes to do things her own way. Ann Marie is a fly-by-the-seat-of-her-pants kind of woman. She has three grown boys who pretty much live by that same philosophy. Her oldest, I just discovered, is traveling the Amazon for an undetermined period of time. I've seen her only a handful of times in my life. She travels a lot. Most recently she spent over a year in Korea teaching. She's now back in the states and was just diagnosed this week with ovarian cancer. Don't know her prognosis, it's too early. I'm sure that Ann's boys, all three of them, love her. But she has no where to call home. We talked yesterday about welcoming her here, but she was the kid who ran away from home so we're not sure she'll come.
I suppose it's worth mention that my father's father also passed from a form of cancer - lung - back in 1994. I was 13 then. I still remember the morning my sister woke me up and told me he died. Sometimes my Grandfather scared me; he had a wild temper and I remember he swore a lot. But I loved him. We all loved him. Especially my Grandmother. She lives each day now without her true love yet still loving her family strong and well. My Grandma is kind of like glue I think. Or better, like thread. Were it not for her, this whole family would have fallen apart years ago. If you want to know how I think she does it, I think she keeps secrets for her kids. Goodness knows, she had ten of them! I think my Grandma would tell you that sometimes keeping secrets is the best way to love someone.
David Schaefer is my father. He is the fifth of ten children. He works on computers, has lots of degrees and certifications he doesn't use. He unbelievably smart, he loves his wife and girls, provides for them well, and makes people laugh often. He has a thirst for random knowledge and knows more than anyone I've ever known...but then again he is my Daddy. He's a good man. His wife and two daughters love him dearly; in fact without him they'd probably not know what to do. This is straight from the mouth of one of them; he's the best thing we've got since the invention of the apple peeler (well, that might have been invented after he was born...not sure.) Anyway, I really don't think there's anything my dad cannot do. (I might be biased, but I've yet met the thing and I'm not a little girl anymore.)
Four of my father's siblings, all the ones that precede him in birth order, have now had some form of cancer. It's an interesting pattern. When he broke the news of Ann Marie to me yesterday the only think I could think was, "Will he be next?"
John 14:25-31
Back in college, in 2004 when blogging was hardly even a thing yet, I was here. Blogging before blogging meant anything to anyone. You can look in the archives for my past writings, but it was much more like a journal in the past. When we started fundraising, I messed around with the idea of launching something new for this new phase of our journey but actually hated that idea. I am a sum of all of my life and so much of it is here already. So I'm keeping it here. At least for now.
My main focus these days is blogging about our newest journey into the bizarre and wonderful world of gestational surrogacy. Posts dated 2013 and forward will trend heavily toward that journey. I don't promise everything I write will be about though. There might be other things that sneak in occasionally.
Please come along our journey with us. As the saying goes, "The more, the merrier!"
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